Bridal Affair

During the past season of testing, I had several dreams that revealed how the American church has pointed the finger at and judged others at times instead of having unconditional love. Some of us have done this while unknowingly committing the same things in our hearts. God gave me these dreams to show how people are not innocent witnesses qualified to judge others; only Jesus is, and He loves humanity so much He took the judgment for our sins upon Himself. He offers acceptance and whole, lasting life to everyone who comes to Him personally and believes in Him. Likewise, we're to love one another, show compassion, and treat each other with dignity. The dreams in the following chapters are some of the discernment dreams that opened my eyes to injustice in the church and my heart.

I had a dream that the bride of Jesus was in a romantic relationship with other brides. In other words, a part of the American church was in a love affair with its own leadership, congregations, and ministries. The church assembly was endeared and devoted foremost to its leaders, and the pastors were captive to the affections of their audiences and followers. In giving adoration and allegiance to one another like this in their hearts, a part of the church had forsaken its bridegroom, Jesus, and were in same-sex relationships with each other.

In the next scene, I saw the bride of Jesus repenting and taking communion with Jesus. As she took the symbol of His blood into her body, it judged her heart and allowed her to discern the exclusive relationship He has with His church. She was recommitting to an exclusive, intimate relationship with Him. It was not an easy road by any means because Jesus's bride unknowingly made vows in her heart. These vows spiritually bound her in loyalty to other individuals and ministries inside the church. She was released as she divorced them and clung to Jesus, but it was still a painful separation.

Next, in the dream, Jesus's bride met with her ex-lovers and told them she was returning to a monogamous relationship with Jesus. They gawked, defended the relationship, and pleaded with her to stay. The bride's ex-lovers desperately wanted her affection, attention, and devotion to remain centered upon their own ministries. When she ignored their appeals, they criticized and denounced her. The breakup was highly controversial because part of the church remained in love with man-led ministry.

God showed me part of his bride emerging in this hour was once a mistress to man-led ministry in the American charismatic movement. This past season, He has been imparting discernment to restore her spiritual sight so she wouldn't be deceived by outward performances, seduction, or vanity. God has been leading His bride out of captivity into the wilderness of repentance and communion with His Spirit. When she emerges from her deliverance, she will look nothing like her former life in the flesh.

SPIRITUAL SIGHT

One night, as I was lying awake in bed, the Holy Spirit gave me a vision of a woman trading in her eyesight. She was receiving brand new spiritual eyes. God spoke to me and said, "Many have partnered with witchcraft, but I am taking these lenses freely with no questions asked and replacing them with true spiritual sight." In other words, He was releasing the spiritual gift of discernment to the church so it could walk away from deception.

Next, I saw another woman trading in her eyesight, who symbolically represented the part of the church in a romantic relationship with Jesus's bride. She required a different procedure, Lasik surgery, to restore her eyesight. This was a more delicate process because she made a spiritual vow and needed surgery to separate from the bond it created.

Repentance from adultery with Jesus's bride is painful because it involves breaking a covenant with other individuals. In giving devotion, loyalty, and affection to the church and its leaders above the Lord, believers bond themselves spiritually to other people, similar to the way that a sexual act unifies two individuals into one flesh.

While adultery clearly occurs in the body, it can also happen in our hearts. Jesus was constantly pointing His disciples past what can be observed to the heart of an issue.

Though the law is clear about not committing adultery in the body, Jesus took it further by saying that anyone who looks a another person lustfully has committed adultery in his heart. Where the American church has lusted after notoriety, attention, and affirmation from audiences and leaders, it has committed adultery in its heart with Jesus's bride.

THE THUNDER OF MAN

It's difficult to share, but I had to walk through this painful process myself. When the Holy Spirit gave me the dream, it made sense of what happened in my heart when I was part of a charismatic church. God opened my eyes to the seduction of spiritual adultery and showed me that only returning to communion with Jesus could break the spiritual ties I unknowingly made with leaders and ministries. As I repented from adultery, I broke up with serving the leadership of man and their agenda for the church, and returned to singular devotion in my relationship with God.

After my family moved to the Bay Area, I still telecommuted and worked part-time for the megachurch. Away from the noise and commotion of the office, God spoke to me about things that were happening in the organization before they took place. He talked to me about everyday things like employees who were leaving for new jobs, as well as spiritual realities. When I called into Zoom meetings for work, I was amazed to hear the church leaders announce the very things that God had already spoken to me about. Before I realized it, I was no longer impressed by their positions; I was impressed by God.

This season of my life was lonely because I was living in a new city and felt isolated working from home, but the Lord held me close through it all. As I submitted to what He was doing in my life, He delivered me from an adulterous relationship with the church. Later, when the Holy Spirit led my family to another congregation in the Bay Area, I didn't struggle again with idolizing leaders.

God dealt with my heart first, and then He showed me that there are interpretations of Scripture that are grooming and seducing congregations into adultery in their heart. These teachings direct honor and devotion to speakers and leaders instead of fidelity to God and dependency on His Spirit.

A PROPHET'S REWARD

More times than I can recall, I was told in the charismatic church that if I received a speaker as a prophet or whatever title they were introduced with, I could receive a reward proportional to the amount of faith I put in their ministry. The reward was often expressed as the impartation of spiritual gifts. Therefore, the congregation or class was encouraged to sit in their seat and open themselves up spiritually to whatever the speaker had to say and their anointing.

Now I understand that this teaching groomed me to put my faith and trust in leaders and speakers instead of discerning the message being shared and keeping my heart faithfully set apart for God. My understanding grew to be that I needed to honor speakers in my heart, and at times with my finances, to receive spiritual gifts and impartation from them.

This teaching opened the door to spiritual adultery, which I naively stepped into when I adhered to its instruction. Again, it was only when the Holy Spirit revealed that this teaching was producing rotten fruit in my life that I finally woke up from its deception.

When Jesus told His disciples that receiving a prophet in the name of a prophet yields a prophet's reward (Matt 10:41), He was not referring to the impartation of spiritual gifts or simply sitting in a church service honoring a person on stage. He had just sent His disciples into the world without a change of clothes or any form of provision, telling them they would be persecuted, abused, and hated, just like the prophets before them who spoke the truth. He said that those who took in His disciples, cared for them, and received their message would be blessed and rewarded through their ministry.

A prophet's reward is not the impartation of spiritual gifts because gifts cannot be earned; they are given freely and at will by the Holy Spirit. Rather, rewards are earned through obedience and righteousness. At times, they manifest physically in the present, but often, they are eternal and stored up in heaven. Most of the prophets in the Bible were rejected on earth and did not seek man's favor because they were not pursuing temporary rewards. Instead, they considered their greatest reward to know and serve Jesus Christ.

Jesus said that those who received His prophets and their message from God would be blessed to see its righteous fulfillment in their lives. A prophet's reward is the eternal message of truth given to them by God to share. There is often a significant cost attached to their message in terms of persecution and trials on earth, but when stewarded with faithfulness, it bears spiritual, eternal fruit that nourishes the lives of those who eat from it and obey its instruction.

A part of the body of Christ, however, has been taught this Scripture in the context of honoring celebrity leaders and speakers. Without discernment, some have eaten rotten fruit that has produced infatuation instead of righteousness. Further, congregations have been taught that they receive a reward for sitting in a seat and putting their affection and trust in another human being instead of obeying the Holy Spirit.

We must have discernment to recognize that pulpit teachings that direct honor back to a pulpit are different from what Jesus taught His disciples. Jesus sent His disciples into the world and told them to search for a worthy person to stay with when they entered a town. They did not entrust themselves to just anyone. His teachings taught His disciples to rely on the Holy Spirit for discernment, not the appearance or validation of other men, because they lived as sheep amongst wolves.

Likewise, we must use discernment when we open ourselves up spiritually to teaching and instruction. If it does not align with the Word of God and the witness of the Holy Spirit inside of us, then we are told to beware and reject it in our hearts. This is how we stay on the narrow road and keep our hearts from straying into spiritual adultery and deception, which sadly even takes place in the church.